Devtober 2021 Post-Mortem

Really should've written this a week ago, but better late than never!

So, Devtober Jam has ended! I feel it was a really good experience and fairly chill, encouraging healthy dev habits, so it was very doable to anyone. Although my initial goals were not met, I am happy that my game is THAT MUCH CLOSER to being finished, which I don't think I would've made it this far without the jam's help. So, without further ado, here's my little post-mortem break down of how the jam went as a whole--

The Initial Goal

As I was working on only half the games for this anthology, the plan was to get "Chance It!" finished by jam's end, and if things went extremely well have a demo for "Fateful Encounter" out as well. It seemed very doable, and it probably was... had I not been so jam fatigued when I entered haha. Jam was slow to start, but initially the first couple of weeks went mostly smooth... this goal still felt very much in sight and obtainable.

My other initial goal was, besides the daily updates elsewhere, I would have made occasional longer devlogs here on Itch throughout the month. Basically, what I had done for my NaNoRenO 2020 project Since When Did I Have a Combat Butler?!

What Went Right

Despite not reaching my intended goal, let's first look at what I did achieve during this jam period:

• The first and a bit of the second week, daily progress was being made
• I actually did a little image scripting and line cutting for "Chance It!"
• "Fateful Encounter" finally saw some writing progress after many many long months
• Finally started Glenn's route on "Chance It!"
• Reached another ending on Van's route and brought it closer to wrapping up
• "Fateful Encounter" has some nice scene dumps drafted

It felt really good to dev again and actually post about progress. I even had a really good writing burst on one of those days! And to see both projects just that much closer to have something to show for it makes me really happy!

What Went Wrong

Of course, as I stated earlier, I did not reach my intended goals, so here's a little breakdown as to why.

• Somewhere in the second week, I began to feel very blah
• Updates became eradicate, with a few days missed here and there
• Some days I felt like I was forcing myself to do just a tiny bit of dev work just so I could post an update
• "Fateful Encounter" didn't get worked on as much as I hoped
• I ended up not writing occasional devlogs on Itch like I had wanted

At some point, I burned out. And I think it's because I've gotten deadline fatigued due to me crazily joining a ton of jams last year, churning out one project after another, to the point I felt overwhelmed in 2021. I found myself working with MikuMikuDance a lot in between, just making renders for fun to relieve stress, so I know I am not at a creative burnout... but it makes me feel so bad that I somehow was able to produce 40 renders in October but not even reach my demo goal for Devtober. I just felt really bleh that whole month, and I notice I tend to do a lot of renders when I'm very bleh (looking at you, 200+ renders in 2015). Why can't that energy be channeled to deving??? *headdesk*

Progress Report:

Even so, I am still happy to say a nice chunk of progress has been made. "Chance It!" is really close to being wrapped up script wise, and "Fateful Encounter" will wrap up at least to a demo (script wise) around the same time. I haven't pieced together the writings I did for FE into the official Ren'Py script yet (I wrote in 2 different documents + a notebook), but for CI we're currently at 7,986 words (the goal is around 10-11k). I have most images scripted in for the scenes voices have already been recorded for (because I like the raw script to be clean for my VAs, so new stuff will be scripted over later). For FE, there's only like about 2-3 more scenes I need to cover before it splits off into routes, which means the demo is also pretty close!

What I've Learned:

There's nothing wrong with going jam happy and churning out a lot of projects, but once you hit deadline fatigue or any other type of burnout, stop. I thought I could handle more than I really could, and this year I even took on an extra project I probably shouldn't of, only adding to the weight of stuff I already need to finish. I'm lucky I have a couple that only need voice application before they're ready for release, which will really lighten my load a lot, and my anniversary project has most of its voice work done... even so, the load could've been lighter if I had some self-control. The end of 2020 was a bit difficult, and not even due to the state of the world, but because my brother and I had to take care of an injured family member. And since being thrown off my schedule, it's been hard to get back on. I also feel like I do the most progress on my games when I don't put them on a public schedule... when I know there's no expectation for me to meet up with that deadline. You may notice how when artists take a mental break, they don't always stop drawing... sometimes they draw even more, because personal art is just that... something they're making because it makes them happy, and I feel like I haven't had that outlet in awhile. So I know that in the future, a healthy dev habit would be to actually just not dev... take some time for myself.... and truly returned refreshed, stress drained.

Analyzing my habits for "Since When Did I Have a Combat Butler?!", despite having a deadline since it was NaNoRenO, I was not only organized but had a burning passion to complete it. I had tried defeating that jam since I started Tofu Sheets Visual, and so I was pumped and passionate and it very much was a personal project. Not only that, there were some days I had very miniscule progress... like, writing a few lines here and there, or a little bit of line cutting and leveling. I took breaks by listening to music, watching movies, playing games... and that was the key. I kept finishing NaNo as urgent, but remembered to take a breather. If you push yourself too hard, you end up procrastinating more than anything.

Concluding Thoughts ---

Overall, I am still happy I participated in Devtober and I look forward to participating again, but with better habits and self-control. There's a reason I always call myself "overly ambitious", because I get ahead of myself easily. Somehow I managed through 2020 because I was doing something right, and I think I should take time to look at what went right in those projects and why things haven't been working out so much in 2021. All in all, I am happy these 2 games are that much closer to being done, so I know this time was not in vain -- if I hadn't had participated, I don't think CI and FE would've seen any progress made. It would've been procrastinated on.... and I really don't want to keep Wendy waiting too much longer, haha. 

So there you go, my experience! It was messy, to say the least, but still fruitful. And I am excited to finally present these to my friend, and then to all of you. Thanks again to my wonderful teammates that have stuck with me thus far, I promise to keep learning from these experiences to become a better director! Let's continue doing our best to make the coolest games possible! <3

And lastly, thank you to Devtober Jam for existing, because writing this post-mortem really helped on reflecting back and really seeing what works and what doesn't, which is a great asset. Looking forward to next year!